It’s not about the tomato sauce…

I’ve been feeling weird for the last few days, not quite my usual self.  Different situations have irritated me;  Like my partner being too busy to give me quality time, my children not doing what they’re asked or that I have to cook dinner again, and there’s no tomato sauce!  I did my usual, ‘right time to fill my tank spiel’ and said a few affirmations.  I went for a walk, ate healthy food and I felt better… for a while.  My irritations seeped back in though and I found myself complaining once again.

So I decided enough was enough, I needed to get to the bottom of why I was feeling so lousy and why my usual tank-filling remedies, just weren’t cutting the mustard!

First of all, I asked myself what was upsetting me and this is what I came up with… I’m not feeling supported, nobody’s listening to me, and everyone’s grumpy.

By the way, I asked myself this question and answered it… out loud, on the way to the beach and as soon as I answered it, I knew this wasn’t about my husband or children, this was about me.

I hadn’t been supporting and listening to myself and I was the grumpy one.  I had lost my power somewhere along the way and was relying on everyone else to make me happy.  During the Christmas holiday’s, I had stopped a few of my regular activities that really make my heart sing.  Everything had got a bit mundane.

I also uncovered a belief, while sifting through my thoughts.  One that goes like this… ‘I’m not supported and I have to do everything on my own.’  Once I realised this, I could see that every time someone didn’t support me I would say, ‘I knew it! Nobody supports me.’ This would validate my belief and I would be right.  Ah hello, did I really want to be right about this?  Definitely not!

So I decided this belief didn’t serve me and I was going to change it.  I was now going to believe that I was always supported.  This all took about 15 minutes to uncover and by the time I was walking home, I found myself singing and feeling much lighter.

I arrived home and Andy said ‘you don’t seem your usual self.’  I replied ‘I’m Ok, just going through some stuff.’  He then said ‘let me know if I can support you’ and I said, ‘I would.’  As I jumped into the shower I smiled and thought, thanks Andy, you’ve just validated my new belief.  Yep, I’m always supported.

What new beliefs have you created and how are they working for you?