Today I’m sharing Sarah Wilson’s blog, I really enjoy the interesting topics Sarah writes about and this one is very close to my heart.  It’s tips she picked up, when she spent an hour with Louise L. Hay.  Louise has been an inspiration to me for many years. Click here to read Sarah’s encounter with Louise L. Hay

By getting to know yourself better, you are more likely to make choices in life that bring you long lasting fulfillment.  Here are a few tips to discover who you are.

My first date was with my dentist!  Anyone who knows me well, will tell you I’m quite nervous about visiting the dentist.  I get sweaty hands, cold shivers and my heart feels like it’s going to jump out of my chest!  I can’t remember experiencing anything too terrible when I was a youngster visiting the dental nurse.  I quite liked getting the ferries made out of cotton wool before heading back to class.  However, these days there’s just something about the sound of that drill, that has me wanting to throw off those attractive safety glasses and run for the hills!

As I often speak to my clients about setting an intention, I decided to do this before heading into the clinic.  I imagined myself feeling clam and safe during my appointment and I decided to ask my angels to come and support me.  My specific words were, ‘Archangel Michael, actually can all the angels that are around come and support me to feel calm, relaxed and safe while I am with the dentist’  I took a deep breath and walked inside.

As I sat down and the assistant put those gorgeous safety glasses on me and then the paper towel around my neck. I suddenly noticed the song that was playing on the radio in the room.  It was ‘I believe in Angels’ by ABBA!!  I had a date with my Angels too!  I had simply asked for support and then was shown proof that I was receiving it!

As you can imagine, my appointment went very well,  I felt looked after and left feeling fantastic!

These magical little miracles are happening all the time, we are just not always in the present moment to notice them.

Next time your looking for a parking spot, need advice or want support in some way.  Make a date with your Angels, ask and if you are open to it, you shell receive!

Photo by Douglas Lyle Thompson

Feeling tied down and stressed out?  By discovering your stress signals and having a couple of tools on board to support you, you’ll have the freedom to enjoy each moment, without the stress hanging over your head.

We all have signals that notify us when we are getting stressed.  However often these signals are ignored because we are too busy, not in the present moment, decide we will deal with things later, or we disregard them all together!

By discovering what your signals are and having a couple of techniques on hand to deal with the issues when they first arise, you will feel calmer, happier and more in control of your life.

Think about times you have been stressed in the past.  What were you like leading up to the situation?  Were you snappy?  Did your heartbeat race?  Did your breathing become shallow?  Maybe you had a nervous feeling in your stomach?  Were you defensive or too nice?  The more you can distinguish the way you react to stress, the easier it will be to respond to the situation before it gets out of hand.

Once you are aware of your signals, think about different ways you could distinguish the stress.

Here are a couple of ideas…

1.  Firstly take a few deep breaths.

2.  Go for the ‘long term gain, rather than the short term fix’ Stress can arise because we procrastinate.  When we go for the ‘long term gain’ we end up with the better, more rewarding outcome.

Here is an example.  Jane dislikes paperwork.

Short-term fix – Jane piles up all her receipts and invoicing, deciding she’ll deal with it at the end of the month. By then, work is busy and she has less time than she thought she would. Throughout the month Jane’s worried about getting everything up to date and now she’s feeling stressed and needs more hours in the day.

Long-term gain – Even though Jane doesn’t like doing paperwork, she decides that each day she will spend a certain amount of time, writing up invoices and filing receipts.  Because she is up to date, some day’s there isn’t anything to complete and she spends that time doing the things she loves.  At the end of the month, everything has already been dealt with and she feels relaxed and content.

Even though Jane didn’t like doing paperwork, she knew that to enjoy her month she needed to have a strategy in place that would work for her.

Think about where you’re going for the ‘short-term fix rather than the long-term gain.’

3.  Try the four D’s

Do it

Delegate it

Diarise it

Delete it

Check in and decide how you will deal with each new situation as it arises.  This could be emails coming in, jobs needing to be completed, phone calls you have to make, etc.  You will find, you have lots more time and your head isn’t so busy when you’re on top of everything.

4.  Get support; make sure you choose someone who is going to support you to feel better, not make the problem bigger, which could make you even more stressed.  It’s definitely good to vent, once you have though, come up with ideas of how you can resolve the situation.

5.  Stay ‘above the line’ by taking ownership of how you’re feeling.  Being responsible for making change.  Using tools to better the situation.

If you slide ‘below the line’ you’ll blame others, make excuses, deny or procrastinate.  As soon as you find yourself there, move back up above the line!

Begin staying in the moment and be aware of your signals.  Once you notice them, you have the power to deal with the stress before it gets out of hand, enabling you to experience happier moments throughout your day.

I love this idea that Jack Canfield explains so simply.  “If you want something new in your life you have to make space for it.  I mean that physiologically as well as physically.  Take a look at your closet. If you have the kind of closet where you can’t fit another thing in there, that might be the reason, you don’t have more new clothes.  If you want a new man/women, you’ve got to let go of the one that stopped dating you five years ago.  In other words, you’ve got to complete the past, in order for the present to show up more fully.”

Have a think about what you would like to attract in your life and then notice if anything may be stopping you either physiologically or physically.

We can look at external circumstances or the people around us and assure ourselves that they’re the reason we are stuck in our boring job, unfulfilling relationship or why we have the weight problem.   If we look closer we may notice we play a big part in the situation.

Where are you on the following scale?

Above the Line

Taking ownership

Holding yourself accountable

Being responsible for making the changes you want to see in your life

________________________________________________________________

Blaming others for your situation

Making excuses as to why things can’t change

Staying in denial

Below the line

If you find you are below the line, begin stepping up and taking ownership of what’s happening in your life.  Become a change agent, where you hold yourself accountable for anything you dislike in your life.

Take some time to discover what might be in the way of you attracting exactly what you wish for.  Awareness is a BIG first step.

Small habits make for big changes, once you have let go of what you no longer need both physically and physiologically, begin creating new habits that support you to attract exactly what you desire.

You create your own reality!

We turn on our TV and the media bombards us with disasters happening throughout our world. We read the newspapers and this is no different, people are complaining about the cost of food, the price of petrol, the abuse in our country, what the government is doing or not doing and the list goes on.

Yes it is true these things are happening. However if we were to focus on how we can change these situations and how we would like our country to be, rather than spending too much time talking, thinking and replaying these situations over and over, would there be a shift? We say the problems are just too big, what can we do? As Mother Teresa says, ‘What can you do to promote world peace, go home and love your family’
Let’s teach our children to love and be loved; When we see someone in need, give them a hand, smile at a stranger, it may make their day.

It’s important to acknowledge what is happening in the world, and yes you even have the right to be angry. However, if you want to create positive change, and every little bit helps. Begin loving your family, your community and everyone you come into contact with, because with enough love we can heal anything.

As Martin Luther King Jr says “Returning hate for hate multiples hate, adding a deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

If we look at many of the problems today, is there a lack of love in these situations? If there were love, integrity and respect in homes, would abuse be reduced?

Think about how you could make a difference, one stone can create big ripples ☺

“The greatest disease in the West today is not TB or leprosy; it is being unwanted, unloved, and uncared for. We can cure physical diseases with medicine, but the only cure for loneliness, despair, and hopelessness is love. There are many in the world who are dying for a piece of bread but there are many more dying for a little love. The poverty in the West is a different kind of poverty — it is not only a poverty of loneliness but also of spirituality. There’s a hunger for love, as there is a hunger for God.” Mother Teresa

I was 17 years old and I had a two day old baby girl when I first heard this statement. It was the local plunket nurse that said it to me. I remember it very clearly; I was pretty worn out from lack of sleep and I was adjusting to my new life as a mum. When the nurse said it to me, I thought straight away ‘I have to take care of my daughter first’, she was so precious and helpless, there was no way I could take care of me first. However over the years I have realized, she was absolutely right! I do a much better job in everything I do, if I’m looking after ‘me’ first.

I now like to use the self-care model to distinguish what level I’m running on.

Optimum Performance: We are taking care of our emotional, mental, physical and spiritual needs. We are living by our values. Our confidence and self-belief are strong which enables us to ask for what we want, living a life we are proud of. At the Optimum Performance level we are living Above the Line, taking responsibility for our actions and living in our ‘courage zone’. By investing in ourselves, we are able to give to others effortlessly. At this level when we begin to slip into the elevated energy level we can quickly and naturally pull ourselves back into the highest realm.

Elevated Energy: At this level we have realised that when we look after ourselves we feel good, and we have more energy, however we still slip back into putting others first and not saying ‘no’ when we need to. This level is where we begin to see the positive results of self-care, however still haven’t mastered the strategies to experience maximum results.

Running on Reserves: This is like a car running on LPG, when our tank is empty we flick the switch and use our reserves, however there is never enough at this level to give 100% and this is when we find ourselves getting grumpy with others, our boundaries become week and we lack energy. This is the time we have to commit to taking care of ourselves filling our ‘tank’ by eating properly, exercising, doing things that bring us joy and meeting our emotional and mental needs and listening to our intuition to find our what we really need.

Empty Tank: This level is when we hit rock bottom. We have nothing to give, our boundaries are nonexistent and we may find ourselves reacting to situations that don’t warrant this type of behaviour. The more we take care of ourselves the more we will find ourselves in the higher levels of the self-care model.

Once you have discovered where you sit on the scale, decipher what you need to do, to get yourself to the ‘Optimum Performance’ level.

I really enjoyed this video and thought you might like it too. Brene Brown talks about the rewards of being vulnerable. Check it out